Video by the extremely talented and somewhat dark Laura Marling.
Her videos, her music speak to me in ways that are dangerous, beckoning me to be that beautifully, tragically human entity I was once addicted to being... a voice in the back of my head telling me how wonderful it might be to be depressed, to feel strongly about something or nothing... to exist.
Anger and frustration, silliness and humor, half-hearted at best, are time-efficient jaunts through temporary, fleeting states of being and self-awareness - defenses against the depression of my environment, all of those who seek to bring me down with them... towards time spent, time lost, on whimsical sentience or into the calling comfort of futility.
Remaining driven, powered, maintained through a necessary aversion to distractions of living - this moment of contemplation, all I have, all I am, perhaps all I will ever have been, as the clock ticks on in increments of dollars, deadlines, and fleeting opportunity - marked by an aging shell and the changing world.
Do I push myself so, to someday have time for being alive, or as a measure against it?
I am as repelled by this video, as I am drawn to its beauty.
... back to work.
About Me
- Myke Amend
- About me? Well… I work a lot, and I update at mykeamend.com more often than here. My day begins with me rolling out of bed and straight to my desk; Barring restroom breaks and eating (should I remember I am hungry), I stay there until 16 to 30-some hours later on the average - sometimes times curling up under my chair because by that point the floor looks incredibly cozy. I prefer to spend my time painting, yet a lot of additional hours go into things such as web work and web maintenance for clients or myself, and various side projects such as comic books and children’s books I am working on. I have been featured in art collections such as Gothic Art Now by Ilex Press, where I can be found alongside some of my favorite artists such as Giger, Brom, and Bajema. My art is an ooky spooky central part of a movie called “Quench” by Zack Parker. I have also been featured (as I am told) in Weird Tales Magazine, and cannot wait to see for myself in the Fall/Winter issue. Aside from these things some of my paintings and prints are owned by people I revere greatly: Voltaire, The Dread Captain Robert of Abney Park, Kaja and Phil Foglio, and others.
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